How-To Guide for BDSM Beginners

Many people suppress their deepest sexual desires. In the past, it was a taboo for exploring beyond missionary position but today you hear about vanilla sex, rough sex, fetishes, and kinks. You may have also heard about BDSM, so what is it?

What’s BDSM?

BDSM means several things like –

  • Bondage & discipline – A sexual act where a submissive partner is restrained using handcuffs, shibari bondage cages, and ceiling hooks. Alternatively, discipline is focused more on behavior alteration. The behavior of the submissive is corrected with spanking or erotic shame.
  • Dominance & submission – Dominant is liable to dictate the submissive in the BDSM relationship. The male dominant is called Doms, while female dominant is called Dommes. The submissive partners are called Subs.
  • Sadism & masochism – It refers to as giving and receiving pain. Masochist experiences pleasure when pain is inflicted, while a sadist finds pleasure in administering the pain.

How to find out which role you wish to play?

You can experiment with BDSM, hiring a beautiful domina in Paris from an escort agency like Lovesita.com. Actually, even if you are dominant in real life taking a submissive role can be an experience. You can even try both and switch sessions. Find an ideal balance, the role that makes you tick is the one for you!

This offers you to explore another dimension with your partner, an alternative realm. You can try any type of fantasy in a trusting and safe environment. This can keep your relationship spiced up and fresh. Both need to be in synch for a happier and fulfilling experience!

How to tell your partner about your fantasies?

It is hard to talk about something new and even before you open your mouth there are plenty of negativities that fill your mind.

  • How will she take it?
  • Will this trigger an argument?
  • Will she laugh or be shocked at my fetish?
  • What if she shuts me down?

The truth about a successful relationship is based on good communication. It is crucial to understand one another and talk about many subjects and this too is not any different. Share your interest in BDSM with your partner. Make them aware of your desires. Without any concerns, you can explore fantasies together and have fun!

If you find it hard to communicate verbally try leaving a sexy note or watch an evocative movie together. Sometimes, your partner may feel awkward about the discussion associated with kinks and feels.

You can suggest things both can try. Start small! Things can always be added later. BDSM is great only when both are on the same page. No one needs to feel pressurized but excited. Openly discuss the way you feel and what you desire.

How to introduce BDSM?

After a discussion there is an agreement to experiment with BDSM but how to introduce it. Being kinky does not mean buying expensive latex outfits or scary hitting tools. Some useful tools are lying in your house to pin someone down to the bedpost or use sex toys or indulge in role-playing. Be sure to have some safe words like when you are enjoying a role play, you shout ‘No’, it does not mean stop the activity. At any point, the action can be stopped.

Enjoy the moment and don’t rush!

Ezekiel